My Road to Boston: September 2014

What a beautiful weekend we just had here in Wisconsin. I didn't hit the pavement at all, due to Walter's 7th birthday, garden harvesting, and the male bow hunting obsessions of my household. So much testosterone, Tim-the-Toolman-Taylor has nothin' on these boys.

So it almost being October, I'm reminded thoroughly of where I was last year around this time, I had run my farthest training distance, 17 miles. I always found that not reaching 20 miles, seemed to be fine for me & that when show time came, I'd be ready to push further. I remember how defeated I felt however, a week out, that my goal of qualifying for Boston might be out of the picture, because I just didn't have the fire & speed I once had. Was this just a wasted marathon journey? So many questions & so much doubt...BUT...start loading up on water, mentally preparing, laying out everything I need a week out, figuring out where I gotta' be, where to park, what to do, etc.

I remember heading for home that morning, and being about 2 miles from there, taking in the beauty of autumn in Wisconsin. Part of the draw towards running for me is the seasons changes, the smells, the sounds, the feeling throughout the year, the peaceful time with God. Listening to the rhythm of breath, shoes on pavement in a steady pace, and God's creation typically waking up as I gallop along.

Summer, I love to go on a humid day, be completely drenched in sweat by the time I get home, or leave early, with the fog setting on open meadows, having the dew gather in my eye lashes.

Autumn, the air is so crisp, smells of fresh cut grasses, leaves changing color, its harvest time. So many animals greet me running across my path.

Winter. Fresh snow, quiet stillness. Johnny Cash. My feet are the first tracks around my block, except for a possible pheasant trying to hide his coloring as he dashes across the road. Breathing & a good pace keeps me warm, except for my buns, which despite all of the under armour & layers, seems to freeze up every time.

Spring. So much expected, especially this year. So many adventures ahead, newness, unknown explorations that the boys & I will venture on, plans for summer vacation, etc. Sounds of waters from the snow melt, running into the creek beds, you'd be amazed how loud they can get. Smells of earth slowly being uncovered, flowers blooming, newness & life.

Anyway, mentally defeated or not, I began the mental preparation & physical prep marathoners go through. I am not always good at drinking loads of water in my daily life, but before a marathon, its all I think about. You want your muscles as supple as possible. I think of it as enjoying a really good steak, so tender, marbled, scrumptious. If you do not hydrate, that steak becomes well done; cramping & failure become prevelant, and this is when injuries occur. I get my music ready, get my clothes laid out. Figure out where to park, how the marathon is ran, shuttles, etc. I do not want surprises that will throw me off of my marathon time, I don't want to miss the National Anthem, I want to be at the start line early, ready, adrenaline-filled, and waiting.

I left my house early, I think by 4 am, cup of coffee in hand, peanut butter toasts & banana consumed. I got to St. Paul, prepared my after race bag, checked, double & triple checked & got in the shuttle line, talking to other runners.

"Are you running the 10-mile today?"

"Nope, I'm running the marathon."

"Oh wow, I'm only doing the ten miler. Is this your first time?"

"Nope, second." and on and on we talked...

Sunrise

It was fun to get on the bus & observe everyone else, wondering, waiting, the bus was a pile of nerves & excitement. The driver, lost, confused, was she even from Minnesota? Somehow, with help from the runners, she got us to the Metrodome.

6222 (26.2 miles...Good luck race #)

I immediately found where I was supposed to bring my after-race sweat bag, dropped that, then nervously wandered to where I'd start, going back into the Metrodome, after grabbing a small cup of coffee, next to a bum, who swore to the volunteers that he was running today, (in the sandals on his feet & tattered slacks,..whilst smoking a cigarette). I went back inside, found one spot to sit down, against the wall, in a corner & listened to others talk about their training, watching them with all of their gear, so many compression socks these days & newfangled gadgets, sweat bands, ipods. Me, other than my SPI belt, chapstick & GU, I'm kind of a minimalist. I have ear buds, but I typically take them out so that I'm able to enjoy the crowd. After some nervousness, a trip to the bathroom (ok, maybe 4-5 trips...), I headed back out & watched the sunrise.

My fellow runners.

It was a cool morning, but the adrenaline keeps you warm & once everyone started lining up, you know, there's NO turning back, this is it, and you can't erase for a second that feeling that you've arrived & today is your day. The National Anthem, always brings tears to my eyes & I sing along, loudly. Gathering of individuals, with this passion for running, feeling so inspired to be apart of this American race, a final place where we gather, as trained individuals, with different paths here, for one joined goal. I have a lot of fun on this day, even though I'm a quiet person, I just cannot contain my excitement.

The gun goes off & there are so many runners filtering through that it is about 7-10 minutes before you get to even drag your toe across that initial chip time line. Once you do however, its game on. That first mile is VERY fast, I like to weave in & out of traffic, in my first marathon, I had this man following me who told me I do quite well cutting through the masses.The bells of the cathedral are banging through the city, everyone whoops it up through the tunnels, its just so joyous. There is so much support in the Twin Cities, so many fun people there to support their family & friends. It is just a wonderful day, full of joy. After about 4-5 things spread out, everyone gets set into their pace.

Running down into the capitol.

I try to stick near the pace setters, I thought that if my goal was to BQ, I should try to stay near them to guarantee I get a qualifying time. For some reason, I misinformed myself about the BQ time, and thought the whole run that it was 3:30 for me in my age group, which meant I'd have to maintain an 8 minute mile, hopefully below that just to make sure I was in. I ended up passing the 8 minute mile group for about 10 miles, I even caught up to the 7:45 group, then had them catch up & pass me as we got closer to the finish line. I got scared & a little mentally defeated, but I kept going, trying to catch back up. I felt the need to hit the bathroom a couple times throughout, but thought no, keep your pace, finish strong. Don't stop. I love running through the mansion area of St. Paul, and then down into the Capitol. It is so beautiful & it moves your heart so much to see the American flag draped with the capitol back drop. I kicked it down running into the capitol & I smiled so big at the camera people, I wanted my family to be able to see my happiness on this day & that momma finished her second marathon.

I knew before I saw the capitol building, that I might not qualify, but I was happy, despite that & so proud that I got this far today. I wrote my husband with my time of 3:32:28 shortly after I ran across the finish & said, I missed it, but I beat my last time by 24 minutes, which is a huge amount of time removed. I was sad, but still proud. 24 minutes, that's almost a whole minute off of every mile, that's a big deal. I was very emotional, and quite rapidly after I stopped running my body started to shut down & I got sick. Sometimes after pushing your body for that length of time, it affects runners poorly. After my first marathon, I wanted steak & beer & was just famished, but felt great. After this one, I just wanted to find my bed and a bathroom. My Aunt Patty, God bless her, came up to see me however & have lunch with me, since I was in the area & to celebrate this day with me. I had a hard time getting back to my car, and had to kneel down with tummy convulsions on my walk there. People were helpful to me, asking me if I needed assistance, but I just wanted to find my vehicle & get outta there. I found it, met my aunt and had a bit of sprite to help my tummy. It was wonderful to see her & I was so grateful to have her come, but I apologized, that after our short lunch I just had to get a move on & find my bed.

All done & back to my car.

After getting home I think it was, its all kind of a blur, my husband could sense my disappointment, so he checked the Boston marathon website again for me, excitedly informing me that I did indeed qualify, (I QUALIFIED) and that the time to beat was 3:35. I didn't believe him, until I saw it with my own eyes. I was elated, over the moon with joy, so pumped to even get to have the potential idea for a future goal in my mind. My best bud Nichole came over with her family to congratulate me. I was NOT doing well, I looked like I had the flu, my kitchen remodel in full swing, it wasn't the best time to visit, but she just was so proud of me. It touched my heart a lot that she cared that much & that her whole family came to tell me good job.

I hope most of all from this big goal that I've achieved with qualifying for Boston, that my sons learn & keep close to their hearts, to never give up & push for what you want. Aspire. Strive. Press on. Try. Keep trying. Keep going. NEVER GIVE UP. Sometimes we fail, sometimes we doubt our abilities, but if you really try & give everything you have that's inside of you, you can achieve your dreams & goals. If you keep a positive attitude while you do it, well, then the sky is the limit (this is often my biggest challenge). I am thankful for those in my life who've been there to support me in whatever crazy goals I've set before myself. I can't wait to see what my kids achieve & I will be there to support them on those days also, I'll be their biggest fan & wish to help them in whatever way I am able, to infinity and beyond.

September 15th, I clicked the button on the baa.org website, putting myself into the running for the Boston Marathon. The wait was long, and nerve-wracking. I continue about my daily routine, checking the website entrant database, for the 57th time to see if my name was listed...still not. Sigh.

September 22nd was supposed to be the day I might "Find out." None of it is certain, but after reading on the website, it seemed that I'd know by then. September 22 came and went, and I thought I might be out & that all of the work & dedication might be for just those times & experiences. Which I gladly carry in my memories and they still bring many smiles to my face, but I'd always have this empty spot for Boston.

Yesterday, September 24th, I am closing up all of my work documents & I'm just about to unplug my laptop, when I get a new email titled, "2015 Boston Marathon Confirmation Of Entry Acceptance." - I gasp, I stare at the screen. My gaping mouth, turns into the biggest smile I can muster, and I yell out "Woo-Hoo!!!" I was kind of glad my boss had left for the day. I danced and spun and thanked the Lord that I was able to go. I wrote to my husband, forwarding the email to him. I left work with an extra skip in my step.

Today is September 25th, my oldest turns 7 years old today and it makes me reflect on life & how greatly our paths have changed and grown since he came into our lives. When I was a kid I ran middle distance in high school. I was horrible at it. My best friend replaced me on the 4x400 relay team & they went to state without me. I was never an outstanding runner, and I never ran more than 2-3 miles, hating it the entire way. My coach, Mike Hall, took me with the middle-distance runners, seeing potential that I never knew I had. I was a good runner, not a fast sprinter, but I have developed strong endurance.

When I was 28, I ran my first 4 mile run. I remember wearing a cheap sports bra, over an under-wire one that I should have never put together & I still have a scar on my chest that will forever note that jumping off point. I just continued around the block to my house. I've done this hundreds of times since that day, but it was the initial step & I recall it being such a daunting beginning. Do I really think I can run 4 MILES?!? I was so fearful, just for that 1 extra mile. Now I don't even think about it & I feel I'm almost cheating myself out of further mileage when I take that "short" route. So weird how my sights have changed.

Baldwin 10K

Hastings Run

Walter congratulating me after Ellsworth 10K

My first 10K was in Baldwin, my buddy Bridget asked me to go to this Booster Shot run with her, and I thought, aww heck, I'm not doing anything today, gotta' try to do one of these races sometime. Well, the end of it had this crazy, steep hill, and I saw others walking, but I was determined to keep pushing &

River Falls 10K

finish it out without walking. I received 2nd place in my age category upon completion, and I was HOOKED.

After a few local 10K's (Baldwin, Ellsworth, and River Falls),

Ellsworth 10K, with role model & friend Rob Larson.

I knocked down a half marathon in Red Wing, MN at the River City Ramble. My time was 1:47, and I was so proud that I ran it in under 2 hours. The last 5 miles was very challenging, but I kept my focus on this one woman, who just kept getting outside of my reach. A gentleman ran up behind me, who was also running that half, he must have been watching me for a while, because when I started to lose hope, and have her pull slightly away, he said to me, "You're not going to let her get away, are you? Kick it down!" I did, I didn't catch her, but I got up closer & came in right behind her. Its a huge mental battle as a runner, more so than physical for me personally. But a friend once told me, when I was defeated, that you just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Just keep running. I know, it sounds like a "DUH" statement, but sometimes, when you think you can't go on, and then you do regardless of fatigue, & thoughts of failure, it feels even greater to reach & surpass goals.

My half finish.

Running in my bud Nic.

So a friend at work was talking to me about the Twin Cities Marathon & that I should try to run it. This whole notion seemed beyond crazy. Back then though, Runners World offered a free training guide, so I picked one up, signed up, and began training, thinking I might, but then again, I might not. My first 10 mile run was a game changer. My girl Jess & I ran to Bay City, via the creek road. She trained with me my entire first marathon. We were so elated when we finished & so proud that we hit our goal.

Fellow Half Marathoners, Jess & Nichole.

The best training run we ever ran was during the Flood Run season. We ran from Ellsworth to Maiden Rock, a 16 miler, and the motorcyclists were happy to "encourage us." I remember saying to her, "I know its cheesy, but their engine revs, hoots, waves, whistles are really helping me to continue on." That was the longest run I ran before my first marathon. I thought at the end that I could run 10 more miles, easy.

MARATHON TIME

My first marathon was an emotional whirlwind. Having my husband find me around mile 18, and then again at 22, telling me to "kick it in the ass!" was just so helpful & I was very emotional during that run. I remember hearing "Sky Pilot" by the Animals, as I ran down the last .2 miles to St. Paul. Seeing the American flag, the capitol building, well, I could barely see the finish line through my tears, I was so ecstatic & my heart was so moved.